One of them is called The Right Questions by Debbie Ford... I'm already on page 60. The basic premise is this... whenever you come to a choice moment in life, and all of life's moments have them, there are 10 essential questions you can ask yourself that will support you in choosing empowerment over disempowerment... Absolutely fascinating!!! Plus she has a whole chapter called "Exposing your Underlying Committments"... Anyone who has taken the RTS seminar series can relate to this!!!
She says that each of us has a flame burning within us, call it our life flame and the choices we make in life either dim the flame or feed the flame (sounds rather like the two wolves... for those of you who have heard that one)... And it is our choice as to whether we will do the one or the others... She lists choices that dim and choices that feed our flame:
Choices that Dim Your Light:
- Being around people who criticize you and can't see your magnificence
- "Should's"
- "Have to's"
- Perceived obligations
- Trying to be nice
- Trying to get others' approval
- Withholding communication
- Lying to yourself
- Gossiping
- Being Late
- Not caring about other people's feelings
- Comparing yourself to others
- Judging yourself
- Judging others
- Not taking the time to enjoy what you have
- Looking to others to make you happy
- Living in fear
- Withholding success from yourself
- Thinking that others are better than you
- Giving away your power
- Ignoring your deepest desires
- Overspending
- Overeating
- Overindulging
- Wasting your time
- Deflecting compliments
- Trying to be someone you are not
- Not setting strong boundaries
- Not having enough alone time
- Withholding love from your family
- Withholding acknowledgement from yourself
- Overexhausting yourself
- Ignoring your inner voice
Choices that Make Your Fire Roar!
- Having empathy for others
- Taking time for yourself
- Spending time with those you love
- Noticing what you have done well
- Resting
- Having fun
- Playing
- Exercising
- Eating well
- Spending your money wisely
- Planning for the future
- Being with people who inspire you
- Taking time to nurture yourself
- Doing what's in the best interest of you and your community
- Appreciating yourself
- Being honest with yourself and others
- Honouring your word
- Paying your bills on time
- Being compassionate
- Being intimate with those you love
- Making love
- Doing charity work
- Telling others how much they mean to you
- Doing what you love
- Going after your dreams
- Making choices consistent with where you want to go
- Dancing
- Forgiving
- Taking responsibility
- Looking for what's good
- Looking for what's right
- Doing a job well
- Being present for your children
- Caring for your partner
- Listening to others from your heart
- Receiving others' love
- Empowering those around you
- Allowing others to contribute to you
- Creating a powerful support system
- Speaking your truth
- Saying no
There you go... do an inventory and see where your fire's at!
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