Pope John Paul II

I don't know if you heard on the news but... apparently JPII engaged in self-flagellation with a belt. I was shocked! I really didn't think that people did that sort of thing. I mean sure, I had see the DaVinci Code and read the book about the Op. Dei organization which supposedly did that... but still. Mind you, at least it wasn't with a metal tipped whip or something. The thinking, as I read it, was that, in flagellating himself, JPII was uniting his sufferings to the sufferings of Christ. The problem I have is this... we have enough suffering in the world without creating more of it! And the idea that our suffering is somehow redemptive, which I know is a big theological doctrine, is beginnning to seem a little off to me. Particularly when we go out and look for suffering.

The other thing that struck me is that... we engage in enough self-flagellation as it is! Self-inflicted, torturous thoughts plague us as we replay our days and our weeks, wondering why we did this stupid thing and not that brilliant thing. We whip ourselves mentally, emotionally and spiritually, creating a huge amount of suffering in our lives. And not only in our lives, but in the lives of others. Anyone who hangs around somehow who self-flagellates, is going to get spattered with blood and guts (figurative!) at some point. Our mood of "woe is me... I am such a bad person"... affects our loved ones and our co-workers... and those we meet in our day-to-day life. Is this self-inflicted mental/emotional/spiritual suffering redemptive as well? Or is it just crazy-making? Does it just create something that is essentially worthless? Why do we beat ourselves up?? And we do it very well! Is it the Catholic/Christian guilt thing? Is it a human condition? Do we doubt our own essential goodness that much? Do we really need to get that twisted out of shape when we make a mistake? Even if we make the mistake over and over again... does beating ourselves up make us better the next time? Some would say yes... that beating a dog or a child can instill changed behaviour... that it is in some way redemptive... "spare the rod... spoil the child". And yet... there's something very off kilter here, something that makes me feel a little ill inside. It doesn't jive with my idea of God... Yes, it is just my idea... but it's all I've got... I don't believe in a God who wants anyone or anything to suffer... Laying that at God's feet, or legitimizing it by saying suffering is redemptive, is a cop-out... and makes suffering acceptable and/or noble. Bull shit... Why don't we just go around creating as much suffering as possible then? For wouldn't that be even more participation in the redemptive suffering of Christ?

The martyr complex really isn't very becoming to us... to who we are as divine children of God... It's a cop-out... and prevents us from fully expressing who we are... Don't you think??